Tuesday, 24 May 2016
I come from a big family, and I LOVE IT! I actually have no idea how people without siblings even function.
As a first born you would think I hated having a sibling come after me but from my childhood I have always had a sibling around. My cousin was my sibling before my sister came along so I have always had someone else in my life to share life with.
Over the years I have seen how our relationship has siblings has grown and changed as well. I remember how we would fight and argue when we were younger over the silliest things. Now it makes no sense but at that time it was a huge deal. And there was no one who was allowed to ever bully one of my siblings or for sure you would get it. I recall my little brother always using my name in defense when other neighborhood kids were being mean to him, yes, I had quite the reputation
Then there is the aspect of your siblings copying everything you do. It was great when it was a good thing, but when it was bad, the oldest always got all the blame. Sometimes even all the punishment. It was a tricky balance but still great fun.
Most of the time when people talk about their siblings they refer to the past when they were kids, for me I want to dwell a little more on the present.
We are at the age where we are in transition season as siblings. When life looks like we are about to go off on our own and our interactions with one another will eventually become less and less.
It has already began in some ways, over the years. Especially when all the careers started and one starts to get interest in other things.
You still share a lot in common but you also gain other new things. This also means friends. When you are kids it easy to keep the same friends. You tend to keep a united front and demand the whole family is included in gaming activities. When you grow up you become more individualistic. Things take a new turning. You may share a lot of what you did growing up but you also develop other interests.
What I love about having siblings is that they are never afraid to just tell me if I go too far from being who I am or never be afraid to tell me I am playing it too safe.
We have grown up challenging each other and also appreciating one another’s individual strengths. It’s true there are families that a sibling doing better than another is a problem but in my family that is not a problem. We know we are different. We were never raised to compete with one another rather to help one another. We lift each other up and encourage each other. We do not give up on each other. We are one another’s best friends.
It’s been amazing watching my siblings grow into such great independent adults. For a long time I was very concerned about their well being especially in my absence. Being the first born sometimes you feel it is your responsibility to be the best example your siblings will ever see. It is true for me because I was told that severally by my parents. It can be a huge burden but I am relieved that they are all doing well. It is hard to always be the responsible one that sometimes you can lose your relationship with your siblings because of being too authoritative. There are many moments that it happened and I had to really slow things down and remember I was just their sister not their mum.
Either way my siblings are great go getters. They all have a lot to be proud off and still have a lot more to accomplish. You would be amazed how automatically we are there for one another in times of joy and of crisis as well. It isn’t even something you need to ask twice. I love that I know they always have my back and will look out for me even as I would them.
Over the years we have adopted honorary siblings which I guess is because of the closeness we already have with one another. We literally talk daily and update each other on major news in our lives and we also support one another’s careers.
I can’t wait for the next season of our lives. It will be amazing and I know we will remain just as close but in a different perspective all together.